Notifications

It's time to come to grips with your victimization, America. If you haven't felt guilty for the last thirty minutes or so, you're in luck!

A United Church of Christ has got just the chart for you.

Let's make sure you've got the appropriate physical equipment to enjoy this ideological exercise in self-flagellation:

  • White skin

We'll also accept “anything paler than polished mahogany.” Got it? Good!

Shall we begin? Here are the “10 Ways You Can Actively Reject Your White Privilege.” First, become a member of the Democratic Socialists of America. Whoa! Looks like I jumped the gun there. That's not the first one. Bear with me.

Here's the whole list:

Now, you have to have an active an open imagination somewhat on par with Stanley Kubrick's to follow this, but we'll try to keep this simple. (Those of a more intellectual persuasion can check out the explanation at The Daily Wire.)

Here is the list again, in plain English:

  1. Don't voice your concerns about anti-white rhetoric
  2. Don't try to improve buildings to make the neighborhood look nicer
  3. Don't say anything to people of different backgrounds, because it's probably an insult you're not aware of
  4. Don't try to be inclusive for the sake of diversity (wait, what?)
  5. Don't ask non-white people what they mean when they say things you don't understand
  6. Don't have minority role models
  7. Harass everyone about your perceptions of racism, both real and imagined
  8. Look for it everywhere, even under your bed at night
  9. Don't participate in conversations about race when you should mind your own business
  10. Remember, very smart people say you're racist ... even if you think you aren't

The list comes from a United Church of Christ with the website NewSacred.org. They have other posts that appear to be quite serious, such as, “Get Behind Me, Satan: White Women and Our Well-Meaning Aggressions.”

The original post explaining these 10 points in SJW-ese can be found here.

The reaction to their list? It's been pretty priceless:

Morgan Freeman, as usual, gets the last word:

Now, that's a brave and enlightened thing to say. As opposed to this idiotic and pointless list.

Correction: An earlier version of this article stated it was a Church of Christ blog, but it is actually United Church of Christ. There is obviously a big difference. UPDATE 9:53 a.m. 3/14/2017