Image Credit: Screenshot/Taunton Police Department

It's always good to be remembered when you go to places in your hometown — unless one of those places is your neighborhood police station.

Unfortunately, that's the case for Massachusetts woman Amy Rebello-McCarthy.

Now, a widely shared Facebook post recounts her bizarre, bizarre crime.

In the post, the Taunton Police Department extended a warm salutation to Rebello-McCarthy by opening with “WELCOME BACK AMY” in a play-by-play recount of her recent arrest.

And it only gets weirder from there.

Police describe their run-in with Amy in great detail. It all started on May 15 when authorities were dispatched to a car crash. Witnesses claim Rebello-McCarthy was standing outside her car as a male passenger tried to drive it away. But just a few things stood in their way.

Authorities snarked:

“That may have been possible if all four tires hadn’t been flattened in the crash, if all the airbags hadn’t deployed and both bumpers hadn’t been ripped off.”

Needless to say, the pair were not in the best state of mind. Police added that when questioned, Rebello-McCarthy could barely string a sentence together, instead “slurring” her words, laughing and drooling.

Her male companion also seemed under the influence, as he could not recall his first or last name. That's when police noticed the gun in his back pocket; he was quickly apprehended:

“Let’s recap for just a moment!! Two very intoxicated people in a car crash, neither of them coherent, unsteady on their feet, slurring and drooling. If that’s not a bad start, let’s throw the gun into the equation. The male party was taken to the ground and handcuffed. The gun was removed from his waist.”

According to reports, Rebello-McCarthy had struck six mailboxes, some of which went airborne and cracked her rear window, while other mailboxes were sent flying across the street onto a lawn and destroyed private property.

Authorities thought they were in the clear as they were transporting Rebello-McCarthy and her unnamed friend to the station. But the reckless driver had a third, unannounced guest with her — a Bearded Dragon Lizard.

And where did she keep her reptilian friend? Just like every other woman, of course ... in her bra!

Police were stunned:

“You can't make this stuff up.”

The lizard was quickly handed over to Animal Control, and, according to authorities, faces no charges at this time.

The same can't be said for Rebello-McCarthy, who was booked and charged with operating a motor vehicle under the influence of liquor, driving to endanger, and marked lane violation.

Her companion, whom authorities said managed to come up with the name Marvin K. Kyewalyanga, was “placed in Protective Custody.”