Cindy Mathis’s 16-year-old daughter Macy gave her 25 handwritten letters for her birthday.
The mom was to open one of the letters on various occasions, such as when she was feeling lonely, when she missed her daughter, when she couldn’t sleep, when she wasn’t feeling pretty, when she needed a laugh, or when she needed to know just how much her daughter loved her.
Less than a year after Macy gifted her mom the letters, on November 20, 2016, the 16-year-old and her boyfriend were involved in a deadly car accident. Macy’s boyfriend died on the scene.
Macy passed away five days later, on November 25, as a result of her injuries.
At that point, Macy’s letters took on a whole new meaning.
Cindy told KRON4 that her daughter “really helped her out in a lot of ways that [she] didn’t realize until after [Macy] passed.”
The letter that was meant to help her when she was lonely read:
I’m sorry you feel lonely. I’m especially sorry if we’re the ones who made you feel lonely. I never intended to do that. I love you, and although you may feel lonely you’re not. You have four pretty awesome kids. We all may get on your very last nerve and drive you to the very edge, but come on mom you gotta love us. Talk to us, kids are smart ya know. We may give good advice.
Also if you just want to crawl in bed with me you can. I’ll play with your hair and rub your back until you fall asleep. I miss being that close to you, because I feel like your little girl again. Please don’t feel lonely mommy. You always have me.
But the one that was hardest to open was the one labeled, “Open when you miss me”:
This one was so hard to open. You don't know how much mommy misses you! There is not a second of the day that goes by…
I’m sorry that you’re missing me. I hope whatever you’re doing you’re okay. I’m probably missing you too. I honestly don’t like being away from the house for too long. I get home sick pretty easily.
When I was little and lived with dad I would look forward to being with you. I think some of it was because you always had good food at your house, but most if it was because I just missed you so much. I will always and forever love you mommy. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me.
Thanks to the teen’s thoughtful gift, her mom now has something to hold on to, something to look at on the days when she wishes she could hold her daughter one more time.
“I need them more now.”
For Cindy, some of the letters have brought her joy, and all of them have made her cry.
The mom of four told KRON4 that she feels the letters are a message Macy “intended to carry out.” Cindy is so thankful she had the idea to write them because, even now, Cindy still has a reason to smile.