Today, We All Learned That the First Lady Owns Two Pairs of Shoes

Screenshot/Benny Johnson

It’s really fun to learn new information.

It’s great when we find out something about the world around us that is important and interesting. Journalism should be about discovering and presenting useful data and stories so that people can live their lives informed.

Therefore, it is my duty right now to declare something that many journalists apparently had no idea about as of this morning: Melania Trump owns more than one pair of shoes.

It’s true. Fact-based, empirical data from Tuesday proves that Melania Trump owns at least two pairs of shoes.

Twitter/@KimKIsMyMom

Furthermore, the first lady and former supermodel is also capable of changing from one pair of shoes, in one location, to another pair of shoes in a different location. This phenomenon is known as “changing” one’s shoes.

This revelation was shocking to some commenters online, who loudly declared this morning that Melania Trump was wearing high heels in a flood zone.

These assumptions were proven false today personally by the first lady, who was seen early Tuesday morning wearing a pair of stilettos while leaving the White House, only to emerge many hours later in Texas wearing an altogether different pair of shoes.

Now, since Melania was in a flood zone, she was wearing a pair of white athletic sneakers. Many in the chattering class openly and proudly propagated the idea that Melania Trump was wearing stilettos in a flood zone.

No, Melania Trump wore stilettos leaving the White House.

Nicholas Kamm/AFP/Getty Images

She wore sneakers in a flood zone.

Screenshot/CBS News

However, you’re not likely to see corrections to these comments and hundreds of thousands of others that were made, declaring that Melania Trump wore stilettos in a flood zone.

Look at this headline from Vogue: (It has since been changed)

Screenshot/Twitter

Here is a tweet from Politico, since deleted:

This tweet, which is literal fake news, got 25,000 retweets:

Here are many, many others:

While I fully look forward to the corrections and retractions from everyone who propagated the idea that Melania Trump wore stilettos in a flood zone, we won’t hold our breath.

And that is what we learned today!

What do you think?

Ted Cruz Gets Face Eaten Off Over His Past Votes Denying Disaster Aid to Places That Weren’t Texas

The ‘Resistance’ Is Waiting for Trump in Texas — But What They Get Is a Bracing Reality Check