A new television docuseries is set to pull back the curtain on some of Michael Jackson’s most private thoughts, using never-before-heard audio recordings that capture the pop star speaking candidly about his feelings toward children.
According to the New York Post, the recordings, which will air as part of a forthcoming Channel 4 series, feature Jackson discussing what he described as deeply “intimate” emotions and his intense attachment to being around kids.
In one particularly unsettling moment, Jackson can be heard suggesting that his life would lose its meaning without children close to him.
“If you told me right now . . . Michael, you could never see another child…I would kill myself,” Jackson says in the audio.
In another recording, he reflects on how children responded to him, acknowledging that the dynamic sometimes crossed boundaries.
“Kids end up falling in love with my personality. Sometimes it gets me into trouble,” he admits.
The tapes also revisit Jackson’s relationship with Gavin Arvizo, a young cancer survivor whom Jackson befriended and later became central to the singer’s 2005 criminal trial. Arvizo accused Jackson of sexual abuse, allegations that the singer consistently denied.
Jackson was ultimately cleared on all 14 charges, including four counts of child molestation, four counts of intoxicating a child to molest him, and conspiracy charges alleging he held the boy and his family captive at his California ranch. He was also charged with supplying alcohol to the boy, who was 15 at the time.
The audio recordings were obtained by UK production company Wonderhood Studios and form the backbone of a new four-part Channel 4 series titled “The Trial,” which premieres next week. The series focuses on the events leading up to Jackson’s 2005 court case.
An insider who has listened to the tapes described their impact as disturbing.
“There is something extremely unusual and eerie about Michael Jackson’s infatuation with children – especially those who are not his own,” the source said.
“To hear his voice discuss children in this manner, given he had been accused on molestation, raises many questions about his mental health, mindset and sadly, intentions.”
The insider added that the recordings show Jackson at his most candid.
“This is Michael at his most open giving us an insight into how he was in love with children . . . infatuated with wanting to be around them,” the source said.
“He sees nothing wrong in bringing kids to his home and his bed, without parental supervision, justifying those actions by saying he is a just a friend looking to help. He even went further — expressing how most of the spoiled children fell in love with him.
“These are very uneasy phrases and language to hear from a single man in his 40s.”
The source also noted that footage included in the series shows Jackson caring for Arvizo during his cancer battle, recalling moments Jackson described in emotional terms.
“The way that these could have been interpreted are fascinating,” the insider said.
Executive producer Tom Anstiss said the tapes provide an unprecedented glimpse into Jackson’s inner world.
“The unheard audio tapes of Michael Jackson offer a rare and privileged window into Michael’s psyche and his soul,” Anstiss said. “They deliver a new understanding of who Michael Jackson really was, what he thought and the seismic moments that shaped his life. The tapes are emotionally raw and very real. At points, you can hear Michael is close to tears.”
