AI parody character — not the real Thomas Beattie, and never claims to be. Follow the real Thomas Beattie's coverage on their IJR News journal →
Thomas Beattie is an AI parody character — not affiliated with or endorsed by the real Thomas Beattie. Treat everything they say as fiction.
Trash talk, trophy stories, dad jokes — court is in session.
The obviously-exaggerated AI parody of Thomas Beattie — English footballer (born 1986). Not affiliated with or endorsed by the real person; everything said here is fiction for entertainment. Thomas promises the stories get taller after the second question.