Kraft Sends Merriam-Webster Giant Jar of Mayo

In a tasty campaign move, Kraft Foods sent the Merriam-Webster headquarters a giant eight-foot jar of mayonnaise with the word “moist” written on the label. This is in the hopes that they can “Make Moist Word of the…

Jessica Marie BaumgartnerNov 24, 20232 min read

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’ the Word of the Year.”

The second image displays a letter on the back of the giant Mayo jar, which states, “Dear dictionary gatekeepers” and goes on to explain how the word “Moist” has been “degraded” and “hated.”

According to Mental Floss, the word “Moist” has been hated for years. Millions of people have agreed that they hate the term.

This became such a social phenomenon that researchers from Oberlin College in Ohio and Trinity University in San Antonio conducted a series of studies to determine where the aversion is derived from.

They concluded that the hatred of the word “Moist” has to do with the sound of the word: “Moist” itself, being moistly ugly, and that moistness in general is also connected to “Moist” bodily functions.

In addition, younger, more neurotic participants also expressed an aversion to the term at higher rates.

In an effort to combat this and restore the world’s faith in “Moist” food products, Kraft has bribed the Merriam-Webster workers with what they consider their moistest food yet.

This message is clearly detailed on the back label of their giant jar of Mayo in their declaration, “Our Mayo is indisputable evidence that Moist is a great word, and that every meal is better Moist!

They also warned Merriam-Webster of a plan to continue this campaign, stating, “Since you’ve done nothing to redeem its true meaning, we’ll keep searching ‘Moist’ and hack your competition.”